4/26/2018. Text your favorite picture from the NEANA spring meeting to

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1 Text your favorite picture from the NEANA spring meeting to Now on Amazon Books Webinar information on Twitter Thomasdavis552 1

2 What is most Important to you? Sense of Belonging Make a difference Professional development Honesty / Transparency Civility / Mutual respect Culture of Creativity Collaboration Thinking Environment Accountability Team spirit / Fun Work Life balance Recognition/ Reward What is the cost of a poor work environment? Morale Creativity Engagement Empowerment Losing a team member makes others on the team question their position and overall morale is diminished. Money Advertising/recruiting Credentialing Orientation Replacement workers to fill the gap For licensed professionals, the cost of staff replacement is 1-2 times the annual salary. 2

3 Think Feel Say/Do Results Internal External How do you show up? Proactive Reactive Asset based Deficit based Results oriented Problem oriented 3

4 Words Matter Words Matter Empowering Words Will Not now Prefer Opportunity Want And Create Opt for Select No/won t Can Desire Disempowering Words Should Might Need Want But Can t Hard Problem Struggle Maybe Whatever Try Build your Preferred Workplace on solid Principles Mission: The reason for your organization to exist Vision: Where your organization and team are going Values: How the organization and individuals conduct themselves when interacting with the public and one another Think Feel Say/Do Results Unlock the potential in others Empowering words Inclusive intent 4

5 Amygdla Hyjack What pushes your emotional button? Emotions Video Think Feel Say/Do Results Use the Thinking brain for Results Use the Emotional brain for Drama Stop the Hijack Proactive Reactive Asset based Deficit based Results oriented Problem oriented The ONLY way to stop the amygdla hijack is to engage the thinking brain Pause What do I want What do they want 5

6 DDT Stephen Karpman David Emerald The blame game 6

7 Victim Innocent, vulnerable, needy. Can t do it myself. Dependent upon others to keep them helpless May be passive/aggressive Seek sympathy and attention. Become resentful and Fear Failure. Avoid accountability.. It s not my fault. Persecutor Healthy father or mother syndrome. Must have the upper hand. Getting even is essential Only the ruthless survive so I ll be one of those. Fear being picked on or perceives as a loser. Needs a victim in order to validate their position. Must have somebody to blame. Takes care of others for their own good. Takes pride in helping others. Wants to be a fixer and make everything right. Rescuer Needs to be needed. Develops co-dependency. Feels used and unappreciated Becomes a victim 7

8 Drama Triangle Video Coach Seeks to empower. Acts without expectation of return. Promotes self-responsibility Thinking partner, NOT fixer. Identifies resources. Clarifies desired outcome. Offers support WITHOUT taking responsibility. Creator Starts with forgiveness of the need to be a victim. Accept accountability. Visualize a better future. Clarify the desired outcome. Assess resources. Engage a coach/avoid the rescuer. 8

9 Encourage/motivate. Enforce standards in a positive you can do it manner. Gives latitude for creativity. Avoid micro-managing. Challenger I know that you know How will this advance your goal? What else? Drama Triangle Video Stop the Drama Creator Challenger Coach Focus on outcome Takes responsibility Challenges to be creative Holds person accountable Motivates Teaches Victim Persecutor Rescuer Powerless Fearful Not responsible Must win Controls others Critical and oppressive Needs to be needed What does Drama look like In your workplace? Curtain Call Just say no to drama You set the stage Avoid the amygdla hijack Flip the drama triangle What will you commit to do differently? 9

10 Buy a signed copy of Leader Reader 1, Authentic Lessons in Leadership Available after this session on Twitter Now on Amazon Books 10

11 Amygdla Hijack Blame game Drama triangle 11