Bolster Business Performance and Life Satisfaction with Virtual Vital Friends

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1 Bolster Business Performance and Life Satisfaction with Virtual Vital Friends A Special Report from Jocelyn S. Davis and Amanda C.E. Levy Founders of the Positive Workplace Alliance

2 Bolster Business Performance and Life Satisfaction with Virtual Vital Friends A Special Report from Jocelyn S. Davis and Amanda C.E. Levy Founders of the Positive Workplace Alliance Tom Rath s recent book, Vital Friends (Gallup Press), reports evidence that friends in the workplace are positively related to improved business outcomes and even life satisfaction. Rath builds on Gallup s renowned research on employee engagement. Engagement, as measured by the Gallup 12, a proprietary measure of engagement, is unequivocally tied to better profits, productivity, sales, customer loyalty, safety, and employee retention in an organization. What s more, negative organizational behaviors such as theft and absenteeism decrease as engagement levels go up. American workplaces, the focus of Rath s recent study, have been ambivalent at best regarding workplace friendships. Management typically outright discourages friendships in the office, especially between staff and management or employees at differing levels in the organization. But Rath s research pokes holes in these long-held ideas as it clearly illustrates that having a best friend at work is a major contributor to overall levels of employee engagement. Vital Friends are those whose absence would diminish our overall life satisfaction and/or would decrease our engagement or achievement at work. Interesting facts from Vital Friends: Only 18% of people work for organizations that provide opportunities to develop friendships at work. 30% of employees report having a best friend at work...you are seven times as likely to be engaged in your work [with a best friend at work] people without a best friend at work all but eliminate their chances of being engaged during the workday. Satisfaction with work can increase by nearly 50% with closer friendships at work. 1

3 With a minimum of three close friends at work, employees were 96% more likely to be extremely satisfied with their life. Friends fill many different and important roles and no one friend is likely to fill all of them. Only 20% of employees dedicate time to developing friendships on the job. Research shows that friendships enhance our health and well-being overall. Research shows that having friends at work, best friends at work, enhances our favorable perceptions of our compensation. It s also important to note that satisfaction with work influences overall life satisfaction. Vital Friends in the Virtual World Jocelyn S. Davis and Amanda C.E. Levy, co-founders of the Positive Workplace Alliance, have found that the key concepts arising from Vital Friends are also critically important in the emerging global workplace which is substantially, and ever-increasingly, virtual. Yet few of us have been taught how to exist positively and productively in a virtual environment, says Davis, Let alone establish and nurture a Virtual Friendship. All too often people working on their own, or working virtually, find themselves missing the camaraderie and stimulation of colleagues, becoming isolated, insular, even out of touch. Expectations may become distorted. Innovation and creativity are more challenging. Focus and energy are lost. Performance and productivity suffer. There s a sense of losing one s edge, becoming less than one s best. Davis explains, We believe it is important to recognize that we humans are, at heart, social creatures who need to be in relationship with others to be healthy and productive. Naturally there are individual preferences regarding the types and depths of relationships one has with others; even so, the primal need for interaction as part of one s work and personal lives is undeniable. In fact, the divide between one s work and personal life is reported by Rath and his research colleagues to be much more permeable than might be expected or desired. What goes on in work relationships influences one s personal life and what goes on in relationships on the home front influences one s work life. 2

4 The 7 Characteristics of Successful Virtual Vital Friendships Virtual Vital Friends have seven distinct characteristics: 1. Desire to be/become their best selves: Virtual Vital Friends are interested in becoming the best they can be - at who they are, and what they do. They often gather together as a group to broaden their horizons and create greater work success and life satisfaction. 2. Desire to help others be/become their best selves: Virtual Vital Friends are interested in helping others be their best. They are committed to building a safe environment, trusting relationships and, over time, a sense of community. 3. Willingness to build on diverse knowledge, expertise and experience: They are an objective, non-competitive, supportive sounding board providing feedback from unique vantage points. Ideally, each Virtual Vital Friend is from an entirely different industry (often from a different country) so that feedback reflects truly diverse perspectives and experiences, getting each member to think way outside his or her organizational, industry, and personal boxes. 4. Committed to bringing a respectful, open-minded and constructive attitude to the group: The group s mindset and ways of being are critical. Everyone is responsible for creating a virtual environment that is solutions-focused, strengths-based, optimistic, resilient and collaborative. 5. Capable of sustaining a future-focus: A forward-looking attitude supported by curiosity and appreciative inquiry lead to identifying and exploring new possibilities. Appreciative Inquiry A way of asking questions that fosters positive relationships and builds on the basic goodness in a person, situation, or organization. 6. Dedicated to supportive interaction, unattached to outcomes: Virtual Vital Friends know that when they provide advice it doesn t necessarily mean that it will be taken. Honest give and take is charged with a spirit of generosity. It s not about who s right and who s wrong. It s about exploring what s possible. 7. Fully committed: Virtual Vital Friends meet regularly, recognizing that relationships take time and attention to develop and flourish. In this busy, global and virtual workplace Virtual Vital Friends provide People and Groups with whom you can safely take your current business challenges for generous, knowledgeable and supportive consideration; The power of focusing on what s going right in any given situation, rather than what s wrong; The opportunity to regularly build on your successes and use your strengths. 3

5 A Group of Virtual Vital Friends can be created in 5 steps: Define the purpose and process for your group Know what you re trying to achieve and define a broad strategy for how you ll get there. Get the right people to join you Decide the kinds of people you d want to participate. Model the expectations Set the stage, share the load, work for the win/win, support and enjoy each other s interests and successes. Go for lasting value Mix it up, keep it fresh, have fun! Remain engaged. Keep your finger on the pulse And be prepared to refine and adapt even change. The Eight Roles Vital Friends Play... It s important to note that Vital Friendship roles are not always reciprocated nor do they need to be. BUILDER - friends who truly want you to succeed, investing in your development. CHAMPION - champions stand up for you and they praise you to everyone else they know. COLLABORATOR - friends who share your passions. COMPANION - always there for you, whatever the circumstances. CONNECTOR - the bridge builders who work to connect you with others who share your interests or goals. ENERGIZER - fun friends, always there to boost your spirits and create more positive moments in your life. MIND OPENER - the friends who stretch your viewpoint, and allow you to express opinions that you might be uncomfortable articulating to others. NAVIGATOR - friends who give advice and direction. Adapted from Vital Friends, Tom Rath (Gallup Press) 4

6 Quick Check-up on Your Virtual Vital Friends Strongly Strongly Disagree Disagree Neutral Agree Agree I have a best friend at work. I work primarily in a virtual environment but never feel isolated; a colleague / associate is just a click or a dial away at anytime, for any topic. I spend time at work developing workplace friendships. I have someone in my work-life who motivates me and genuinely wants me to succeed. I have someone in my work-life who is my advocate, singing my praises, supporting me, and encouraging me in my accomplishments. My workplace actively encourages workplace friendships. I have someone in my work-life with whom I share similar interests. I feel comfortable reaching out to virtual colleagues / associates for some level of social interaction during the work day. 5

7 Strongly Strongly Disagree Disagree Neutral Agree Agree I have someone at work who encourages me to be my best. I have someone in my life who is a constant and supportive companion. I have someone in my life who constantly expands my network of contacts. I have someone in my life who is fun, upbeat and exciting to spend time with. I have colleagues / associates at work who I encourage to be their best. I have a diverse group of colleagues / associates with whom I can consult and who are objective, supportive, honest and noncompetitive. I have someone in my life who constantly challenges me to consider new ideas and ways of thinking, which stimulates me to grow intellectually. I have a diverse group of colleagues / associates who are constructive and forward-looking; they are available to help me find solutions when I need them. 6

8 Strongly Strongly Disagree Disagree Neutral Agree Agree I have a mentor in my life, someone from whom I can seek guidance and grounded advice. I have colleagues / associates who are committed to our virtual friendship. Total Points Point Value Score (multiply total points by point value) Total Score (sum of all columns) If your score is more than 54, great! And, there is still room for improvement. Consider your low score responses and take that first step. If your score is less than 54, it is time to get going, it s time to build your network of Virtual Vital Friends. 7

9 Building Your Network of Virtual Vital Friends... What difference would it make... To your life at home and at work? How might upping your score impact your work and life satisfaction? What results would such a network help you achieve both personally and at work? If you are ready to... expand your body-of-knowledge, areas of competency, professional networks enjoy the benefits of sharing insights and successes with like-minded individuals experience the stimulation of new and diverse ideas from sources you trust intensify your focus and energy on matters that really interest you exchange best practices to enhance your body of knowledge and areas of expertise build social contacts and make new friends create alliances with your hidden partners - your Virtual Vital Friends Then you are ready! Ready to establish your own Virtual Vital Friends Group. Vital Friend -- someone who measurably improves your life, a person at work or in your personal life whom you can't afford to live without. If this person were no longer around, would your overall satisfaction with life decrease? If this person were no longer a part of your life, would your achievement or engagement at work decrease? If yes to either or both, then a vital friend. Tom Rath, Vital Friends Interested in learning more about the value of Vital Friends? You ll find Tom Rath s book here: 8

10 The Positive Workplace Alliance Jocelyn S. Davis and Amanda C. E. Levy Jocelyn S. Davis and Amanda C.E. Levy are co-founders of the Positive Workplace Alliance, which specializes in helping individuals, teams and organizations thrive; applying Positive Psychology and positive organizational behavior to the workplace. They believe that investment in a positive workplace is the new frontier for establishing and sustaining, global competitive advantage. They have experienced this in their own work. In 2004, Davis and Levy established a working virtual group that over the past three years has become the foundation of each of its member s professional practices, providing support for growth and the challenge of diverse opinions and viewpoints. This virtual working group, the Founders Group, counts in its membership professionals in customer care, education, science, design, manufacturing, healthcare, sociology, psychology the financial services industry, non-profit organizations, communications, and more. The group is professionally, educationally, and geographically diverse. Levy explains, While we have common interests in Positive Psychology, we created a group that was diverse in its perspectives and experiences. This variety creates the opportunity for unique insights as we move together to apply the academic research in Positive Psychology to the workplace. Davis says of the group, As experienced professionals, we each have different interests, talents, experiences and strengths. Today we know from Rath s work that there are many Vital Friends who fill many different roles as friends in the workplace. We have created the ideal environment for the development of Virtual Vital Friends. Among us, we fluidly meet the Vital Friends needs of each group member. Positive Workplace Alliance The Positive Workplace Alliance is a dynamic group of seasoned business professionals focused on helping organizations establish and maintain workplaces where the individuals and teams flourish - and the organization itself thrives in meeting its mission. Contacts: In the US In Canada Jocelyn S. Davis Amanda C. E. Levy jocelyn@positiveworkplace.com amanda@positiveworkplace.com 9