Dealing with Difficult, WIIFU Negative, Disengaged, De-motivated People Janice Davies The lady with nice in her name Attitude Specialist

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1 Dealing with Difficult, Negative, Disengaged, De-motivated People 7 tools to Creating the Change Process Janice Davies The lady with nice in her name Attitude Specialist WIIFU Identify people and problem Eliminate your negative feelings Understand the impact of personalities Examine the relationship scenario Communicate assertively Boost self-confidence to you and others Create a professional positive attitude Who are these people? New customers, Old customers Peers/workmates, Employees, Employers The Boss, The Manager, The Team Supervisor, Sales support staff, Accounts department,customer service department Parents, Children, Partners, Sons, Daughters, Grand, Parents, Pupils, Teachers, Friends, Acquaintances, Strangers, Neighbours, Teenagers, You! What does this cost a company? Hewitt Associates Global Research 7000 companies each disengaged employee costs an average of $10,000 in lost profit annually 1 st - More disengaged employees that those who are happy at work. Gallup Survey Disengaged employees cost NZ around $3.6 billion 3 New Zealand Gallup biannual poll Disengaged workers on increase 15% are actively disengaged 4% Increase since 2006 Manufacturing highest 22% Service industries lowest 12% Disengaged workers less change resilient, less trusting, undermine others Different Statistics John Robertson & Associates Conduct Best Places to work survey 1 in 4 fully engaged at work 28% employees disengaged 46% between neither fully either way Cost on rise to NZ companies Estimated $5.9 billion pa. 1

2 Good News! Towers Perrin 85, countries Research (Global) Employees underperform reasons: 1 in 7 employee is fully engaged Most are moderately engaged Vast untapped potential Many people want to contribute Highly engaged stay with positive impact Lack of goals Interesting work Lack of training Lack of motivation Others work slowly Only what needs Unsupportive management Bullying Negative relationships Low self esteem Lack of confidence Survey Solutions 1 = 2 Tell employees what you expect from them Ensure they have right materials and equipment Give them the opportunity to do their best Remember recognition and praise Let them know you care about them Keep encouraging their development Get to know your employees Managers improve your skills Discussion What motivates you? What is your greatest challenge? What I can do to help YOU SOUL LEADERSHIP What hinders your goals? 2

3 Negative Feelings Your Feelings OUTSIDE or INSIDE INTERPRETATION DECODE True or False Fun or Fear EXPRESSION DECISION RESPONSE FEELING Excited or Scared YOU Interpersonal or Personality styles Pain >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Power 3 Roles/LIVE/PLAY PARENT ROLE 3 Roles/LIVE/PLAY CHILD ROLE Critical Nurturing Whinging Learning 3

4 3 Roles/LIVE/PLAY ADULT ROLE LOSE/LOSE Supporting and Equal Partners I m not okay You re not okay LOSE/WIN WIN/LOSE I m not okay You re okay I m okay You re not okay I m okay WIN/WIN You re okay Ten Vital Ingredients Of High Self-Esteem Knows his/her strengths and weaknesses Feels admiration for successful people Sets professional and personal goals Establishes harmonious relationships Takes responsibility for his actions Expresses wants and needs Knows how to set limits firmly and with care Expresses him/herself creatively Is optimistic Develops transformational relationships. Veronica de Andres the Argentina Director of SEAL 4

5 Ten Vital Ingredients Of Low Self-Esteem Esteem Boosters at work Is unaware of own abilities Is very jealous and over-critical Sets unrealistic goals or no goals at all Establishes competitive relationships Blames others. Makes others feel guilty Does not express real feelings, wants and needs Cannot set healthy boundaries Is afraid of making mistakes Copies or imitates others Is pessimistic. Celebrate person's anniversary company. Remember birthdays Ask for ideas for improvements Give tcredit and recognition for any improvements Send personal messages - i.e. Great job/report. Put up attractive pictures of inspirational, motivational posters for employees Share the task of choosing the posters/quotes Provide a regular morning tea Allow a casual day out of uniform Many people are juggling roles - allow them flexibility 30 th June 2010 Workplace Bullying Report NZ one of highest on world 1728 workers surveyed Health, education, travel, hospitality 18% bullied 75% suffered workplace stress Higher health, education REASON ineffective leadership Behaviour Spreading malicious rumours or insulting someone Copying s about someone to others who do not need to know Picking on someone or setting them up to fail Physical intimidation Overbearing supervision or overloading someone with work Making threats about job security Using abusive and humiliating language Exclusion or victimisation or any unfair treatment. 5

6 Laiseau Fairre Autocratic Democratic Consensus Leadership Effective Communication Sender Message Receiver What gets in the way? Telephone ringing, talking, radio, background noise, machines, outside noise, fax machine,???? THINKING, KNOWLEDGE, EDUCATION 3 Styles of Communication Passive Aggressive Assertive Assertive Expressing thoughts, feelings and opinions openly Compromising Honest and direct Considers others Spontaneous Avoids excessive apologies Rely on own feelings and owns them Creating Confidence Where in 5 Years Have a goal Overcome fear Try something new Achieve Have a goal Overcome fear Try something else new Achieve REPEAT 6

7 Attitude is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education than money, than circumstances, than failures, than success, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company a home a relationship. The remarkable thing is we have a choice, every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for the day. We cannot change our past. We cannot change the fact that other people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90 % how I react to it. - Charles Swindoll Positives Can change Benefits of YOUR work What it provides you What can you learn Negatives Can t change What it doesn t provide What can you learn Dealing with Difficult, Negative, Disengaged, De-motivated People Listen, educate, coach, praise them to succeed SOUL LEADERSHIP 7