CPD Session. Presented by: Delegate s Notes

Transcription

1 CPD Session Presented by: Delegate s Notes

2 Managing Conflict in the Workplace Content Managing Conflict in the Workplace Page 1. Session purpose and outcomes 3 2. Introduction 3 3. Managing Conflict 4 o What is Conflict? 4 o The common sources of conflict 5 4. Strategies to mitigate the risk of Conflict 6 o Signs of Conflict 6 o Guidelines for handling conflict 7 o Assisting others to handle conflict 7 o Apply empathy 8 5. Steps for Handling Challenging Conversations Attributes of a good leader when handling conflict Summary 20 Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 2

3 Managing Conflict in the Workplace 1. Session Purpose and Outcomes: The purpose and outcomes of this CPD session is to enable delegates to: Understand the main sources of conflict Learn techniques and tactics for managing conflict Implement strategies to mitigate the risk of conflict Approach and handle a difficult / challenging conversation Develop attributes of a good leader in a conflict situation Mediate a conflict situation within your own team Apply strategies to reduce conflict across departments. 2. Introduction For most people, volatile situations are uncomfortable and cause a lot of stress and negative emotions. However, conflict is inevitable and also associated with creativity. Without conflict there is no major personal change or social progress. On the other hand, runaway conflict (as in modern war) can destroy what men intended to save by it. Conflict management then becomes crucially important. This involves accepting or even encouraging such conflict as necessary, but at the same time doing everything possible to keep it to the minimum essential to change, to confine it to the least destructive forms and to resolve it as rapidly and constructively as possible (Harvey Seifert, Social Scientist and Howard Clinebell Jr., Pastoral Counsellor) Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 3

4 3. What is Conflict? A process that begins when one party perceives that another party has negatively affected, or is about to negatively affect, something the other party cares about I.e. a difference of opinion, values or points of view One of the major causes of stress is unresolved conflict. Managing a conflict situation is not something we are born with it is an acquired behaviour. Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 4

5 3.1. Common Sources of Conflict Conflict in a workplace setting can be a normal part of doing business. In some cases, conflict that is managed properly can be beneficial, as when it fosters an environment of healthy competition. However, conflict may also have a detrimental effect. As a manager or business owner, you need to be aware of potential sources of conflict within your work environment Some of the most common sources of conflict in the workplace today are: Change Implementation of new technology, legislation, processes, and systems can all lead to stressful change. Workers who don't adapt well to change can become overly stressed, which increases the likelihood of conflict in the workplace. Interpersonal Relationships When different personalities come together in a workplace, there is always the possibility they won't mesh. Office gossip and rumors can also serve as a catalyst for deterioration of co-worker relationships. External Changes When the economy slides into a recession or a new competitor swoops in and steals some of a company's market share, it can create tension within the company. This stress can lead to conflict between employees and even between upper levels of management. Poor Communication Companies or supervisors that don't communicate effectively can create conflict. For example, a supervisor who gives unclear instructions to employees can cause confusion as to who is supposed to do what, which can lead to conflict. Subpar Performance When a worker in a department is not "pulling his weight," it can lead to conflict within the department, perhaps even escalating into a confrontational situation. A supervisor who fails to acknowledge or address the situation can add fuel to the fire. Harassment Harassment in the workplace can take many forms, such as sexual or racial harassment or even the hazing of a new employee. Companies that don't have strong harassment policies in place are in effect encouraging the behavior, which can result in conflict. Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 5

6 Limited Resources Companies that are looking to cut costs may scale back on resources such as office equipment, access to a company vehicle or the spending limit on expense accounts. Employees may feel they are competing against each other for resources, which can create friction in the workplace. Pressure Life today as we all know is highly pressurised. A little pressure is always good to drive performance and stretch us but too much pressure leads to a lack of focus and clarity, which often results in conflict. 4. Strategies to Mitigate Conflict If we are to successfully deal with conflict, we need to know what to look out for. This will help us to prevent the situation from getting out of control Signs of Conflict Knowing what to look for: Anticipation being vaguely aware of differences and changes that may cause conflict Conscious but unexpressed differences internalised awareness of specific areas of difference and problematic issues, focus still on common goals, less on differences Discussion conflict addressed openly and parties are made aware of issues, people still productive but focus shifting Open Dispute arguments, both parties conscious of issues and differences, group losing sight of common goals, lower productivity, strained relationships, more pressure Open Conflict heated words and debate, no backing down, resolutions not top priority, differences very evident, communication guarded and not open Division unresolved issues, separation and division, people taking sides, allied groups forming, negativity, hostility, resentment, tension Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 6

7 4.2. Guidelines for Handling Conflict: Acknowledge the conflict Identify the real conflict what exactly is the real issue? Listen actively to all points of view what is your viewpoint? Explore and generate ways of resolving the conflict how can we solve this? Select a solution and clarify responsibilities who will do what? Schedule a follow up when can we meet to check up? Remember: Avoid getting personal and vindictive Keep your voice low and calm Use I messages to avoid blaming by saying You... And ask questions for clarification and reflection Express appreciation and use empathy to show you value the person s input. I have understood you Listen and observe non-verbal signals what is their body language telling you about them? 4.3. Assisting Others With Handling Conflict Determine if you are the best person to assist with the conflict Avoid being judge and jury and allow both parties a chance to voice their opinions openly without interruption Summarise what each one has said Confirm the accuracy of what you have summarised by asking questions Establish the best points of agreement Clarify the points of difference Create a shared vision ask both parties what their ideal situation would be Generate a possible solution by asking both parties for input and making mutually beneficial suggestions Reach an agreement to implement and assess the solution allow people to take shared responsibility for solutions Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 7

8 4.4. Applying Empathy To become successful at managing emotional and irate people better, we need to be able to recognise what they are feeling. Empathy is the power of imaginatively experiencing another s experience. The psychological equivalent of air is to feel understood. Stephen Covey 4.4.1: Tips for Using Empathy Effectively Empathy can effectively build a bridge for two-way communication. Effective use of empathy allows people to express exactly how they feel and lets them know that you care enough to listen. Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 8

9 In order to achieve this, use the following techniques: Listen for feelings The most critical skill with regards to empathy is your ability to listen to what the person is feeling, even when they aren t saying anything. When dealing with people face-to-face, look at their facial expressions and body language. These are all clues that can allow you to delve into unspoken feelings through openended questioning. Over the phone, you listen to their vocal tone and their choice of words Focus on solutions Once people have had the opportunity to express their emotions and are assured that you understand, you can then focus on a solution and take actions - Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 9

10 The rule with irate people is always Feelings First, Facts Second The reason for this is that an emotional person is not always a rational person. Our aim is not to beat them at an argument or make them angrier - it is to diffuse the emotions in order to deal with the real issues. Useful empathy statements: It s clear you re concerned about this I can hear you re worried about this I d be frustrated too if a client messed me around like that I d also be anxious if my salary was paid late It must be most annoying to repeat yourself over and over again It can be very confusing when one person tells you one thing and another person tells you something else. It sounds like you ve been let down / disappointed It wouldn t surprise me if you felt confused It can be very upsetting when someone else causes you to miss a deal/sale It sounds like you ve been having a hard time That must have been very frustrating What does empathy do for us? Gets emotional content out of the way, and allows us to proceed with business When the other person feels heard and understood, more chance of working towards a solution Demonstrates that we are human Keeps us from sounding defensive, and reduces the possibility of an argument Can turn a negative situation into a positive one Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 10

11 5. Steps for Handling Challenging Conversations 5.1. What I want to talk about and why acknowledge the person Use their names Demonstrate empathy be careful of assuming how you think they feel, so use empathy statements like It can be very frustrating when. Apologise if appropriate avoid agreeing with negative statements made about the company or your department, shifting blame or giving the person negative inside information 5.2. Gather further information to assess the situation To do this you need information. Ask the other person relevant questions to discover the facts. Do not waste time, so ensure that the questions are focused and relevant Check Understanding To ensure that you have listened effectively, you need to test your understanding by summarising or rephrasing. The other person then has the opportunity to add more information or correct any misunderstandings. It builds confidence and gives them a sense of being heard Explore alternatives to sort out the conflict Make sure that the information is clear, relevant and easy to understand. Where possible, offer an alternative and allow them to decide on which option they would prefer. Provide information that anticipates future needs e.g. In order to prevent this from happening again in future you could Agree on an action plan- who s accountable for what Offer a realistic and workable solution and explain what action/s will be taken. Take responsibility for carrying out the actions proposed Set a follow up date to review progress Check in with each other to ensure satisfaction. Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 11

12 Remember: Give the person your full attention Use active listening to show that they have your full attention Do not interrupt Avoid getting defensive Don t take it personally Keep your voice low and calm Use I messages to avoid blaming by saying you Ask questions for clarification Take notes Focus on the facts as well as the feelings hear what they are not saying Ask appropriate questions Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 12

13 6. Attributes of a good leader when handling conflict Leaders need to manage conflict when it arises. Conflict situations differ from situation to situation and person to person, so where do leaders start when they want to understand the conflict styles of themselves and others? A useful tool for developing this knowledge is the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument (TKI). TKI is a tool that assesses an individual's typical behavior in conflict situations, describing the behaviors along two dimensions: assertiveness and cooperativeness. TKI helps leaders understand how interpersonal group dynamics are affected by conflict-handling styles, as well as helps them make informed decisions about choosing an appropriate style when approaching a conflict situation. These five Conflict-Handling Styles are: Competing: You try to satisfy your own concerns at another's expense. You win and they lose. Some people think competing is bad. I counter that it's not bad; competition is necessary at times, based on the situation. However, if you only manage conflict through competition, then you are Competing: You try to satisfy your own concerns at another s expense. You win and they lose. Some people think competing is bad, but it is not all bad, competition is necessary at times, based on the situation. However, if you only manage conflict through competition, then you are ineffectively managing situations and people. Collaborating: You try to find a solution to conflict that satisfies all concerned--a win-win. Collaboration takes a lot of time, resources, energy and bandwidth. Though many leaders encourage collaboration, it is often difficult for both parties to get exactly what they want, which is why it is often used in high risk situations. Often, when people say "collaborate" they actually mean either "compromise" or just "work together." Compromising: Your solution only partially satisfies each member in the conflict. There are no winners and no losers. Compromise is an acceptable solution; however, be aware that if you are a leader who only compromises, the team may start to game the system and ask for more than what they truly need as they know their leader will compromise during the negotiations. Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 13

14 Avoiding: You don't try to satisfy yourself or other people involved in the conflict. Instead, you stay away from the situation entirely. This mode is used when emotions are running high. To be honest, Avoiding is a Band-Aid for the conflict situation; nothing is resolved and the topic is put into a parking lot until later. The fact is you will have to eventually deal with the conflict. Accommodating: You are willing to sacrifice your own needs and desires for other people involved in the conflict. You lose and they win. Some people think accommodation equates to being a doormat. I often hear "Only wimps accommodate; I have a business to run." This is untrue. Accommodation is the best tool to use when you are not the subject matter expert or when the outcome is not that important to you. Effective leaders need to understand all five conflict-handling modes, and be able to identify the best mode to use for various situations. To help illustrate when to use, and when not to use, each conflict-handling mode, I've developed a cheat sheet. Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 14

15 When do we use which style? Below you will find an explanation of when to use, and when not to use, each conflict-handling mode in relation to common conflicts encountered in the business world. Also included are signs that indicate you may be overusing one particular mode. C O M P E T I N G When to use: There is an emergency that requires quick and decisive action. When unpopular steps are necessary, such as enforcing rules, disciplining team members or cutting costs. The company / deal is on the line and you know what it will take to get it back on track. Some people will take advantage of those who display noncompetitive behavior. In this case, it is necessary to adopt a competitive strategy to protect yourself and your interests. Job interviews, negotiating pay and getting on your manager's calendar. When not to use: If the outcome doesn't really matter to you and there is no reason to compete. When you are not the subject matter expert, competing for the strongest voice is inappropriate and will create even more conflict. It is easy to become competitive when you are angry and want to prove a point. Using whatever power you have to express this anger is not effective behavior for leaders. You may be overusing the competing mode of conflict-handling if you find yourself surrounded by "yes people," or if others are afraid to admit mistakes or ask you questions. A C C O M M O D A T I N G When to use: Preserving harmony is the most important aspect of the conflict situation. The issue at hand is much more important to the other person. You realize you are wrong. Accommodating in this situation shows that you are reasonable. You want to build social credits for future use. You are outmatched; it would only damage your cause in the long run if you didn't accommodate. Employee development is your goal; letting your team experiment and learn from their mistakes will enable that. Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 15

16 When not to use: Safety and security are paramount to resolving the conflict. The outcome of the conflict is vital to the organization's success. You may be overusing the accommodating mode if discipline in the organization is lax, or if you feel your ideas and concerns don't get the appropriate level of attention. A V O I D I N G When to use: Emotions are high, and people need to cool down. The issue at hand is actually just a result of a much simpler issue that can be solved more easily. Your team is fully capable of solving the conflict without your involvement. More information should be gathered before facing the conflict, in order to resolve it more productively. The benefit of facing the conflict does not outweigh the cost of doing so. There are more pressing issues at hand. When not to use: The decision at hand must be made quickly. The core reason is to avoid a frank conversation. You may be overusing the avoiding mode if there is coordination trouble due to waiting on input, there is an atmosphere of "walking on eggshells," or decisions about important issues are being made by default. C O L L A B O R A T I N G When to use: Your objective is to learn from the conflict. Collaborating is a good way to explore other people's views. There are hard feelings between members of the conflict that need to be resolved to improve the organization as a whole. The concerns of both parties are too important to be compromised. When not to use: A quick decision is imperative to the situation. Resources are tight. The conflict is trivial, and doesn't need the time necessary for collaborating. You may be overusing the collaborative approach to conflict if others are uncommitted to your decisions or policies. Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 16

17 C O M P R O M I S I N G When to use: The potential disruption involved with asserting your goals is not worth the effort. The opposing members of the conflict are of equal power standing. You realize the situation is complicated and needs more time to solve than is available. A temporary solution is needed. There is immense time pressure. When not to use: When compromising ultimately undermines the values and principles of the organization. If an attitude of gaming is noticed, which will deflect attention away from the merits of the actual issues at hand. You may be overusing the compromising mode if the insistence on compromising takes away focus on larger issues, or if you notice a cynical climate of gamesmanship. To be most effective, leaders need to use all of these conflict styles. Being adaptable and nimble is a strength when it comes to facing conflict. Understanding these different ways of approaching conflict also develops Emotional Intelligence (EQ), another key element to successful leadership. Time to Test Your Conflict-Handling Skills Do you have a good grasp of your preferred conflict style? While experiencing conflict, do you feel you are aware enough to adopt the most productive conflict-handling mode? Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 17

18 What is your primary conflict-handling intention? Indicate how often you rely on each of the following tactics by circling the number on the right that you feel is most appropriate. Rarely Always 1 I argue my case with my co-workers to show the merits of my position I negotiate with my co-workers so that a compromise can be reached I try to satisfy the expectations of my co-workers I investigate an issue with my co-workers to find a solution acceptable to all 5 I am firm in pursuing my side of the issue I attempt to avoid being put on the spot and try to keep my conflict with my co-workers to myself 7 I stick to my solution of a problem I use give and take so that a compromise can be reached I exchange accurate information with my co-workers to solve a problem together 10 I avoid open discussion of my differences with my co-workers I accommodate the wishes of my co-workers I try to bring all our concerns out in the open so that the issues can be resolved in the best possible way 13 I propose a middle ground for breaking deadlocks I tend to go along with the suggestions of my co-workers I try to keep the disagreements with my co-workers to myself in order to avoid hard feelings Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 18

19 Scoring and interpretation: To determine your primary conflict-handling intention, place the number you circled (1 5) that represents your score for each statement next to the number for that statement. Then total up the columns. Competing Collaborating Avoiding Accommodating Compromising Your primary conflict-handling intention is the category with the highest total. Your fall-back intention is the category with the second-highest total. Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 19

20 7. Summary Remember that it is never personal it s only anger talking Detach yourself and put yourself in their shoes Never patronise or minimise the other party Allow the person to vent never interrupt! Read between the lines and try and see both sides of the story Be careful of prescribing pushing your ideas and solutions Listen for feelings first and facts second Ask appropriate questions and allow the person to make suggestions Clarify details and never assume Treat ALL people as equals Customer Centric Solutions (Pty) Ltd 2016 Page 20